Something about me.

000awkward

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7 thoughts on “Something about me.

  1. Spell It Aut

    I love that last bit about going home to play Minecraft together. Once, when I picked up my son after he’d had a particularly stressful day at kindergarten, without even thinking about it I said, “Come on R, let’s get OUTTA this place!” His teacher didn’t seem to appreciate it.

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  2. stuffwiththing

    I formed a community with other special needs parents, they spoke my language. Also found joining the parents and friends group gave me a role at school which made everything easier, having a job/purpose helps guide conversations.

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    1. suburp Post author

      I am newly volunteering in the tuckshop which was good for some connections but also actually seemed to have been seen as really positive by my son’s classmates =)
      I do want to connect w parents of other special needs kids, I just don’t know quite how, and given the school’s attitude, I wonder if I should tell them first and just put up a flyer or something. It seems that the special needs staff is not authorised to give names or no of, for example, the other autistic kids parents. Or they don’t want to..

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  3. Benison O'Reilly (@BenisonAnne)

    I am not on the spectrum but I am shy so I can relate to how you feel. Interestingly I have become less shy as I get older but I was never in the ‘school mum’ crowd at primary school, even when I only had my two older (typically developing) boys.
    I did later discover some great mums at my sons’ high school canteen – interested in literature, politics etc – but it’s a huge school (1400 boys +) so therefore a broader church.
    Rest assured, you have friends online, including those who are happy to talk politics!

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    1. suburp Post author

      Although I have come to think that my son’s autism comes genetically from my side – my brother and my father definitively have autistic traits – my personal awkwardness in social situations is pretty much acquired (i was pretty social in school as a kid). Expat with a small child though.. admittedly, I was hoping to just find a few local friends in the school crowd once my son would go, but it made me realise I am just not like them… I prefer few but good friends too, that enjoy or understand the things I like, but sometimes it would just be good to be a bit more involved, be it to organise some playdates and help my son socialise as well..
      Funny you should say that with the canteen, I just volunteered at the tuckshop and while we didn’t exactly talk politics and literature, it was a very welcoming, open group of women. =)

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  4. Kathryn Arnold

    My experience socializing… except no Nemo to play Minecraft with.

    I belong to several Facebook Aspie groups… socializing is an often spoken of problem. At 60, I find there are many more on the spectrum my age than people realize. Many, if not most, are self-diagnosed…and many more haven’t figured it out yet. (An experience, by the way, that is both amazing, because it explains so much, and horrifyin. It’s not freeing until you can embrace it.) Unfortunately, attempting to socialize with another Aspie is not an automatic meeting of the minds. If I could coin a new word for autism it would be “differentism” because the no-two-created-alike aspect of being human is greatly accentuated in autistics. The one thing we do seem to have is greater understanding and, sometimes, tolerance. The youngsters and the angry can be a pain, but those mature enough to think accept the challenge of giving to others the grace we know we need ourselves.

    So, socializing difficulty often leaves me frustrated and/or lonely, but I feel some kind of satisfaction in not being just another head in the herd. It’s a mixed blessing.

    My favorite Aspie groups, btw, are based in New Zealand and have many Aussie members.

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    1. suburp Post author

      Although I do not believe I am autistic, I am certainly different, being foreign, and also through a few life experiences… You make a good point with the ‘differentism’ – the other side to it is the ‘sameism’ that makes it so hard for our society to let in those who are different, autistic, disabled or just ‘not like them’ in any other way. I also agree that simply because they have autism too, other kids are not automatically ‘ideal friends’ for my son. but it helps when the parents don’t judge their behaviour – our yours…! I can only imagine how it must have been pre-internet, or even before Asperger’s and more about Autism was actually known to the world (the first book I read about autism was ‘look me in the eye’ by JE Robison). Finding people who ‘get you’ online must have been great!

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