We are having an “adventure day” tomorrow. Well, actually, we are just going into the city. Lately, we have made good progress on the acceptable drink when out, but it’s still true that I think carefully about what I put in my bag, where we are going (and where we can make breaks) when we go for a longer outing. It’s important to have adventures though. See new things, get in new situations. Learn to prepare, to say when it’s too much and also to cope when we cannot immediately change it. Or when Mum took the wrong kind of drink. (“red juice” is apple-blackcurrant. still his favourite.)
nb: I made a new FAQ page and changed the header.. – check it out? 😉
Our year continues with more trouble in school. Nemo still has daily support (the new aide is kind and calm) and they have now been willing to trial a few preventive solutions I have put to them (quiet lunches, respite days), but his current reflex to swear and get angry (at least that’s what it looks like) in situations of stress, is taking a bit of a toll on the ‘support team’. On me too, to be quite honest, but since things are rather chill at home in terms of expectations and environment, I simply do not have the Rumpelstielzchen experience on a daily basis, and there is only so much I can do when he is in school. Needless to say, that we do NOT swear like sailors at home, we do not condone it at all and I understand the school has to draw a line…But I still believe that the use of swearwords in moments of distress does not prove he is making the conscious choice to be ‘naughty’ or whatever?! Will be really thankful for any input…
To say that Nemo has had a bit of a rocky start into the new school year, is probably putting it mildly. . Today, I had a meeting with his brand new ‘case manager’. I am hoping for a fresh start, he likes her… I also think that I made it quite clear she has to jump in on it and get him out of the spiral of stress situations and disciplinary measures in the school. I am not totally contesting them (there was swearing, running off and kicking things.. and people) But just telling him to count to ten and breath when things are getting too much…just not good enough!
Yeah, not so sure about this day.. The meeting was incredibly awkward, I felt that the suspension was as much meant as a “wake-up call” for me as for Nemo. Which might be necessary for some parents, but I am kinda ‘all over it’ already, at least as much as I personally can be (because, you know : life). In brief, I felt judged and the whole ‘formalisation’ (reports, letters, behaviour contract) made me feel like it has more effect on administrative, and possible legal, follow-up (in case of what ?) than actually being efficient steps towards handling the situation (ie managing anxiety and anger).
Having had some really sad news the night before (re: life..), I really couldn’t say much at all.
But I told Nemo that I loved him, no matter what.
Ah.. it’s really not only parenting (although we are at the moment dealing with another suspension from school…). I haven’t been overly well lately (in.my.head. mostly) and although I have some comix prepared, didn’t really feel like posting. Or like anything, really, once I was done getting through the day. I have to remind myself how much I enjoy making the comics though, and also the feedback I get from you guys.
This is really just a side note on parenting in general. We are currently in the longest holidays if the year, it’s hot (remember, Australia),and I have limited budget for outings and stuff.
6 intense weeks, not every day is bliss… Why lie about it..?
I mean “autism parent” or not, apart from all the bliss, this parenting gig can be hard work, frustrating and incredibly frustrating… It’s all part of it. 🙂
That’s also why it’s so great!
I am never sure what to think of those statements or thesis where divers great figures of history are post mortem diagnosed with autism, or any other condition only known and researched during the last century. I am sure you have seen these and other examples, too. I mean, I believe that there was autism all throughout history, and I am not saying that some descriptions by other people of the time do not sound like at least autistic traits in some of the personalities. But without knowing their exact circumstances and what else could have caused similar behaviours, a post mortem diagnosis can only be speculation. Yes, I guess it feels good to point out these people (..all men?) as examples how greatness has been achieved in spite of – or was it because of – their autism, but although my son has a clear preference for science, at the moment, our main goal is really a happy life of acceptance and fulfilment rather than putting the pressure of outstanding achievement or talent (in whatever) on my son.